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Hitting The Wall As A Man


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On 5/14/2021 at 7:40 PM, Steve Jabba said:

I often get comments on my Youtube videos that I've "hit the wall" and that I am no longer capable of attracting hot women. Hell, even fake Twitter accounts have sprung up in my name, purporting to be, trolling me, etc etc. 

It's all rather amusing and I know written by little Gamma haters. 

Well, let's examine that shall we?  

Right now, I am 45 years old. I have dramatically let myself go : I am about 12 KG's overweight, I haven't trained in probably 2 years, I've had recent injuries that fucked up my arms and knees. 

I've been eating a shitty diet for about 14 months, drinking too much, not paying attention to myself. 

And yet...

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It's pretty obvious. I look better now than I did 9 years ago. LOL. 

Take that you inadequate little haters!

Jokes aside, I do think genetics play a strong part in how you will turn out. And you know what? I think Orwell was right: 

"Every man gets the face he deserves at 50"

There's something beyond the quality of the skin or the EXACT baggage under your eyes..It's your mannerisms, your character...The ACTUAL kind of man you are , that is important. 

Personally I don't see it.  So do we slowly degrade after 36 or so, or can we maintain for much longer?

We can 100% slow down the ageing process. I’ve read pretty much all there is to read on diet and exercise and I think it all comes down to one thing. Stress and negative beliefs).

I’m 39 years old. I set my own business up 15 years ago - which I fucking love doing. I lift weights. I eat healthy. I still party. I have had my fair share (no where near you by the sounds of it but done pretty decent). But the main thing is at age thirty after getting depressed and anxious I took a course called thrive which gave me the mental tools and techniques to quickly get in a positive state.

It gave me a framework and reference point to have an internal locus of control, realise 99% of bad feelings are caused by bad thinking styles, gave me the power to slowly replace negative beliefs with positive ones and gave me a technique to get myself out of a funk quickly. In your book Steve it sounds like you found similar tools (process the positives in thrive is basically reference points). 

Since then I have also added more esoteric teaching and beliefs about how the universe works to my toolbox. My key thing now is focusing on acting more on my sense of entitlement (I think I deserve the best of everything but don’t always act on it!) and going living abroad consistently. 

One thing I love about this forum and your mindset Steve is it gives me another example of someone slightly older than me still living a life that looks super appealing to me. 

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In fact I forgot to make my point on the last post haha…

Everyone I know who took on a life that wasn’t meant for them. Begrudgingly followed what they were supposed to do. At my age of 39. Look shattered. 

And it’s not the path. I know others who loved that path. They got married and just loved everything about it. They look good. Stress is ageing. 

 

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Just now, Pabloestacio said:

In fact I forgot to make my point on the last post haha…

Everyone I know who took on a life that wasn’t meant for them. Begrudgingly followed what they were supposed to do. At my age of 39. Look shattered. 

And it’s not the path. I know others who loved that path. They got married and just loved everything about it. They look good. Stress is ageing. 

 

Agree with all of that.  I had this conversation the other day with my mate here in Belgrade.  I am saddened that I am not in a better position financially - but I can absolutely turn this around.  BUT

I would not change my choices for anything.  I am proud of what I have done over the last 8-9 years.  I lived life on my terms, and to hell with what everyone else said, or what the prevailing norm is. 

I've observed that most people don't choose their life path.  They go with the flow and try to avoid any discomfort.

If we are approaching tribulation times, I'm certainly more prepared for it than most I know (I do not mean financially, but mentally, physically, spiritually). 

I'm not afraid.

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On 7/5/2021 at 2:43 PM, Viking NYC said:

I got really into some of the manosphere/red pill stuff back years ago and it did nothing but harm to me.  It wasn't Rollo I followed but another one of the best known of these guys.  Instead of taking a hard look at oneself and focusing on self improvement, it always gives you a way out by blaming modern day women and culture for the results you're getting.  Completely eliminating that type of thinking from my life is one of the best things I've ever done.

The only "red pill person" I respect is rich cooper.  Maybe it's cuz he's gone through shit........ I dunno.  he just tells me to go out and do stuff to be a better man.  so I thing that's a solid.  I don't understand the company he keeps though...

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On 7/6/2021 at 10:06 AM, Pabloestacio said:

It gave me a framework and reference point to have an internal locus of control, realise 99% of bad feelings are caused by bad thinking styles, gave me the power to slowly replace negative beliefs with positive ones and gave me a technique to get myself out of a funk quickly.

Epictetus: People are not disturbed by things but by the view they take of them.

The human condition never changes, only wears different outfits.

Edited by maurice_bendrix
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On 5/14/2021 at 7:40 PM, Steve Jabba said:

So do we slowly degrade after 36 or so, or can we maintain for much longer?

Age is a convenient barrier to hide behind. This is built on a lie. A limiting belief that our health steadily declines once it peaks in our 20s and 30s. Jonathan Cawte  Sports Scientist & founder of Executive Athlete.

 

Yoga may be a good practice to stay healthy longer.

"Stretching, but more specifically Yoga has been used by athletes, both amateur and professional to lengthen their careers. So it is no different is you want to train mixed martial arts! When you walk into any gym, the first thing you will see before any session kicks off is people stretching out."

Extract from the article Is Starting MMA After 40 Years Old a Realistic Goal? from https://fightnomads.com/ (love that name)

 

There are some exemple in the MMA world of men who hit the wall and look great!

Just saw a video of Georges St Pierre at (40 yo)

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Another example that blew my mind is Yoshihiro Akiyama, a 45 year old fighter.

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A man who hits the wall and maintains himself physically looks super cool.

 

These are examples of sportsmen who push their bodies enormously for their discipline, but without going to these extremes, I think that the majority of men by maintaining themselves physically and by paying attention to their body can remain attractive well beyond 50 years

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Returning to seriousness, yes you can still look good and attract younger women in later years.  There probably is a slowdown but if you've lived your life correctly i.e. fully exploited your younger years then you're certainly not bothered by it.  The trouble begins when you have unrealised ambitions that you're now too old to fulfil.

Plenty of younger women like attractive older men, especially in countries where I just happen to spend a lot of my time. 😄

 

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15 hours ago, Steve Jabba said:

Returning to seriousness, yes you can still look good and attract younger women in later years.  There probably is a slowdown but if you've lived your life correctly i.e. fully exploited your younger years then you're certainly not bothered by it.  The trouble begins when you have unrealised ambitions that you're now too old to fulfil.

Plenty of younger women like attractive older men, especially in countries where I just happen to spend a lot of my time. 😄

 

True!

I´ve found that in countries/states that are culturally more traditional age isn´t really something a man should be worried about, provided he has his health, finances and looks taken care of.

On the other hand, the more regressive/leftist a culture is, the more women will look for a man in the same age bracket, making differences of over 5 years an impediment to a relationship or even a fling.

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